CONQUERING THE FEAR OF REJECTION
Here’s the magical formula for overcoming the fear of rejection: GO OUT AND GET REJECTED.
Psychologists have a fancy word for this: DESENSITIZATION. The fastest way to conquer any
fear, is to face it head-on. Every time you experience that which you fear, you will be a little less-
sensitive to it.
My own story illustrates this. I was once the shyest guy in San Francisco—when it came to
meeting women! Everyone who knows me perceives me to be a self-confident extrovert. Starting
at age 10 I was accustomed to speaking before hundreds of people. But I was timid in
approaching women. My first date was as a sophomore in college. And it was a miracle: I bumped
into a coed coming out of the classroom and we flirting for two minutes every Monday,
Wednesday, and Friday between classes. I kept waiting, but it finally dawned on me: she was
NEVER going to ask me out. I literally had to force myself to ask for a date and fortunately she
said yes. Otherwise my dating life would have been over before it started. Later I was rejected
hundreds of times by women. It still hurt a little, but the pain was a lot less than the first time. So
go out there and get rejected! Every time it happens, you will be a little less sensitive.
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